So true...

image via here. 

XOXO, 

Kate

maybe its okay...

XOXO, 

Kate 

Dinner at Eight.

I am SO excited that despite Rebekah's crazy busy life, she is bringing back dinner at eight. 
As per her blog, A Bit of Sunshine, she notes that "Dinner at Eight is a special monthly project born out of desire to be more intentional about dating our husbands during this crazy season of life with very young children and not a lot of extra means to afford hiring babysitters and going out to dinner on a regular basis."


A few months ago, I started my own version of this and added a twist that it didn't have to include dinner.  Chris and I would rotate out each week and on a night that he was off work.  Because we don't have weekends together, I thought this would bring the dating feeling back to our lives.  It only lasted a few times b/c like anything else with a family with young ones, it is a commitment.  I remember how excited I was about my turn---our very first at home date night---Spa Night.  Of course, I went all out and transformed our bedroom suite into a spa.  We had so.much.fun & escaped from our everyday routine.

When it is was Chris' turn, he knew how much I was dying to paint something in our house.  We painted the laundry room together and he did El Charro pick-up {our favorite Mexican}.  Cuteness.

  So anyways, as I said...we made it a few times and then what always happens does.  

I AM thrilled that Rebekah is bringing this back starting in February because I need a good kick in the tush to motivate me in this area of life.  I suggest you check out her blog and think about participating too.  I know a lot of couples with kids.

who are busy. 

who put their kids first. 

who need a date night. 

Get creative in love! 

XOXO, 

Kate

closer

& closer.
to the 2 of these babes being the bestest of friends.

its one of the most important things to me.
{to teach A&A to take care of one another}
help one another,
because someday, it will mean more to them than i explain now.

& how cute did these i.heart.east.tennessee shirts turn out? oh, my, i need to make myself one.

XOXO, 

Kate

american honey

this time next week I will be sitting next to a four year old.
shewww, {that happened quick}.

{babies back to school}

I thought this would be some post about at least my Anderson crying and holding my leg for dear life.
{Nada}.
Both A&A did fabulous this morning.  This is Anderson's first experience at a daycare while Avery is in the preschool class.  {so glad they are in the same program}.
He walked in, checked out a few toys then spotted 7 other boys {yes, ALL boys}? and had a seat to eat some breakfast. I gave him big hugs and kisses and he plopped a pineapple in his mouth :)

Avery's biggest concern was "when I hear my brother crying, can I go to the baby room and see if he is okay?"
{she is becoming such a fabulous big sister}.

Here is hoping there day stays great.

XOXO,
Kate

change.thru.choice {new job}

yesterday was my first day at The Solution Source, LLC., an outpatient behavioral health facility. I will be working as a Case Manager over Knox & Anderson counties. If you are interested in Case Management, check this section of our website. We provide very extensive CM services that fosters a holistic approach {something I love}.  Oh and peep out the staff---looks like my name is already on there ;)

Day 1 went great and there was the usual overload of information, explanation of paperwork, procedures, etc.  For the past 5 years, my social work practice has been with adults with disabilities and my new population with be primarily children with behavioral & related systematical problems.  I say systematical because with every child is a set of parents, guardians, etc.  By working with the child, I will be working with the system as a whole.

i look forward to the challenge and hope this is yet another career that helps me grow as an individual & mother.  i hope to quickly gain confidence and expertise in this new role and serve others as i would want service to myself. 

XOXO, 

Kate 

2011{goodbye}

After seeing my sister's post, I decided to do the same.

Farewell 2011--a year of ups and downs, goodbyes and hellos, and more learning, loving, and creating.

in january I i was on maternity leave from just having Anderson in December 2010.  Avery turned 3 & chose the theme of her birthday party for the first time, a tea party.

in february I i went back to work with A&A at two different daycare providers.  I felt like my life was spent in a car.  Chris had a birthday and we tried to stay warm.

in march I i pretty much just worked and took care of the kids.  Anderson was finally sleeping through the night at this point so sleep became more normal. i began taking this blog more seriously. ;)

in april I we went to my mom and dad's for Easter.  Avery went to an egg-drop and will forever think that the Easter bunny flies around in a helicopter. To this day, when she sees one, she yells, "look, its the Easter bunny!"

in may I i rushed around getting work done earlier in the month for a beach vacation with my whole family at surfside beach{outside myrtle beach}. LOVED that place! this was Avery's first "real" beach experience as she went as a baby.

in june I i started lots of pool time with the kids.  avery started swimming without floaties and getting SO good. i had my swanky baby vintage hiring show and my sister came to visit with my niece, Madison.  we played a lot---Farmer's Market, World's Fair Park, etc. i found out i got the swanky baby vintage consultant position to cover Knoxville and surrounding areas.  i had resigned from my job as an independent support coordinator to stay home with the kids & do SBV.

in july I i officially became a SAHM. Avery & I watched fireworks from our front-yard and she was amazed. I visited my mom and dad, spent a lot of time with bebe at her pool, ate lots of watermelon, zucchini and squash. I loved July 2011.  It is one of my favorite months of my whole life. perfect.

in august I i began my first season with swanky baby vintage. opening day was amazing and i had several of my first trunk shows.  i loved making everything look pretty and meeting new friends.

in september I i took in every last possible day at the pool. i finally had a routine day with the kids and a good cliental established for swanky. summer became fall and fall DIY decor was in full effect.

in october I i visited my mom and dad's house where my sisters, niece, and grandma were also visiting.  we had an awesome visit full of crafting, a fall festival, the girls went to see Disney Live, and lots of wine and laughs. Halloween was a blast as Avery was so into it.

in november I i found out that swanky was going 100% wholesale and doing without consultants.  this was rather disappointing to me; however, around the same time, I met a lovely women at wal-mart who reminded me why i love practicing social work so much.  i visited my mom and dad again, applied for jobs and nailed an interview.

in december I i got a new job {which I start later this week}, played Santa Claus and had a wonderful holiday at my mom and dad's with my lovely sisters and niece.  Most importantly, Anderson had his first birthday and began walking.

Here's to 2012.  I am hoping it is a little more stable and less of a roller-coaster ride.  As much as I loved 2011, it brought a lot of instability, & broken relationships that will forever effect myself and family. Cheers to New Years!

XOXO, 

Kate 

SAHM{why it didn't work for me}.

I have put this off for a few months now.

I am trying to remember that this does not make me a failure.

Here it is {unedited} & {maybe a little selfish}.

The TOP 10 reasons being a SAHM did.not.work.for.me.

If you don’t like what I have to say, don’t read it.

#10: I like adults…very few, but I do.

I didn't realize how social I was.  Thank goodness, right? I mean, I did spend the majority of my twenties getting a degree in‘social work.' I guess that means I am a little social.  I like asking someone how their day is going, if there is anything they need, etc.  Before I decided to stay home with A&A, I told myself, “I have to continue hanging out with adults & other moms at least weekly."  I didn't do it enough.  As Anderson got older, I had a more difficult time even talking on the phone when A&A were awake.  I missed talking to my mom on my 8:30a drive to work.

#9: I like stuff.

I remember that day like it was yesterday…”Hun, I don't care anymore.  We can get rid of one of the cars, my iPhone, the cable, I won’t buy Avery Swanky OR MJ, I promise.  I just want to be ‘for real’ poor.” Well, I got a little taste of that.  I can’t stay away from nice things though.  I would look around my house and think, “how much do I love that piece of furniture, I could get $50 for that on Craigslist.”Slowly, you run out of things to sell.

#8: I like to smell good.

I think taking a shower is another thing on the‘to-do-list,’ always have.  When you stay at home, it is a royal treat to take a shower.  If you don't set your alarm before your kids get up, that shower will wait until naptime {if you are lucky}.  Most of the time, it would happen after the kids go to bed.  I even tried setting my alarm, but it didn't work.  Mentally knowing that you have‘no where' to be just makes you turn the alarm off. 

#7: I set high expectations.

You cannot set high expectations when you stay at home with your kids. Period. Set your standards low and when big things happen, pat yourself on the back.  Don’t plan your whole day around some amazing educational craft activity and be disappointed when your kid spends 10 minutes on it and would rather play hide&seek.  Seriously? Does she realize I used my 40% Joann's coupon on that ****?

#6: I am not a good teacher.

Oh I tried. So hard, but God has a special place for Preschool teachers.  I even studied homeschooling methods for Big A. I became very intrigued with the Charlotte Mason method and implementing this technique. Bull****. While I completely agree Avery would thrive under this principal, this mama cannot discipline through character. I sounded like a douche-bag and she looked at me like a was crazy. {easier access to take more advantage of me}.

#5: I do better with more on my plate {a variety}.

As much as I like to complain when I am ubberly busy, I do better.  Knowing I have everyday, any day to do laundry, clean the house, etc., honestly I do better when I know I only have a Friday night to do it.  Reflecting back on my childhood, I was always on the go.  It is better for me. Staying busy helps me check things off the list.

#4: I like to poop alone.

However, this does not mean I don’t love my children.  I promise, I love them with all that I am.  Everyone should have the privilege to p**p alone.  Wouldn’t our society be hilarious if we were cooped up in an office all day, then when we spotted a co-worker going to p**p we went along. NO, it wouldn't so why should I have to sacrifice that privacy?

#3: I like to feel {sorta} pretty.

Here is another one,“hun, I promise not to wear sweatpants OR pajama pants everyday.”However, he would come home time after time & I would say, “Ugh, I am sorry I am still in the same clothes I was in last night.”Luckily, I have the kind of husband who would pick me up, kiss me, and say,“you look great to me.” I never felt great though---could just smell my armpits even more.  If you don't have good self-esteem, what your husband thinks does not mean ****. I want my parent's marriage.

#2: I don't like to feed my kids food from a can OR box.

I just don’t.  I may not eat like I should, but I am really, really weird about what my kids eat.  I lay awake in bed sometimes and count how many fruit and vegetable servings my kids had that day.  Don’t get me wrong; I think its okay to give your kiddos mac&cheese and SpaghettiO’s every once in a while.  However, when this becomes more than 3 times in a week, its time to get a job.  One of our biggest responsibilities as parents is to provide our children a variety of healthy foods.

#1: I don't have a village. It takes a village.

It really does.  I am 99.5% sure if I lived close to my mom and/or sisters this lifestyle may have worked.  Don't get me wrong, I am appreciative of my MIL, but she is busy and has many obligations to fulfill with her other granddaughter.  If I lived near my sisters, grandmothers, cousins, etc., I know we would be together at least every other day.  I love my mom's stories about how her and her sisters {my amazing Aunts} would get together and bake all day while us kids would play.  I know I could guarantee on Sunday dinners at my mom's house {one less day to cook, yes please}, grocery shopping alone, and individual children quality time. Those things are important.  They are the“make-it-or-break-it" moments.

So Folks, there you have it.  The honest-to-goodness truth on my personal struggle staying home with my babies.  Do not get me wrong, I don't have any regrets.  I am just lucky enough to get outta it before I do have regrets. 

‘Hey

It might never be the same

We might never live those days

Gone by but we can try

Mornin'

Let's kick the babies out of bed

How 'bout you and me instead

Hangin' on up and gone

Baby hold on

(let's start this over)

Baby hold on

(we're not much older now)

Baby hold on

(if you still see what i see)

Keep holdin' on

Hold on to me’

-Dixie Chicks

XOXO,

Kate 

{wow}?

yeah, wow. I went on my first job interview in ummm {a lot of years}.

i was nervous, very, very nervous.  

i am so insecure until i get that total reassurance factor. 

{maybe its the middle child syndrome in me}? OR maybe its anyone? {during my google+search+interview}, I realized the 'nervous' feeling is total human nature. 

Regardless, it went really well. 

My 'interviewer' noted that my resume spoke for itself which was a really uplifting compliment. 

I am not going to lie, I worked my booty off in college 

{& sometimes wished I partied a little more hardy}. Its okay though, I did have my fun, but kept my dedication to the reason for being there. I worked hard, served hard, and loved even harder. 

{something I hope my own children will do too}. & I was lucky enough to fall.in.love. 

triple.whammy!

Regardless of what happens, I loved today.

{I got a super sweet vibe} 

& the thought of providing private therapy excites me! 

I loved the challenge today brought & for a long time, appreciated that people really believe in that 'bachelors level.' 

I have so many emotions running through this blood-o-mine.  Keeping 2 beautiful kiddos under the age of 3 in line, trying to go back to work, keeping my marriage going, etc.  It's funny, the other day I was sitting around & realized that the last "date" my husband & I have been on was when we were at the beach, & before that was his 30th birthday. {WOW}. However, thats okay. 'Cuz I take full responsibility for accepting my our decisions as it comes to "us." We love our children.  We are okay with putting them first and some people just don't. {& thats okay, because we are all in our own situation}. 

{WOW, rambling}. 

Bottom line is that I am glad to be easy to please.  

My husband joined me with a glass of wine, errr or a few bottles & a nice dance party & I was in "awe" again. 

{sorta thought I was @ a frat party, but not gonna lie, loveeeed it}. 

Ironically, should I get this 'job,' I will be providing a lot of therapy as it relates to the family systems theory. 

'enough said. 

XOXO, 

Kate 

The Belle Brigade: New tunes

We are huge Raising Hope fans and if you saw last week's episode, you would have heard an awesome tune at the end; Losers by The Belle Brigarde.  These two are right up my musically ally. {love}
I love the words of this song and think its something we all need to work on.
{despite if you are on the top or on the bottom}. I will be buying more. & more.

There will always be someone better than you
Even if you're the best
So let's stop the competition now
Or we will both be losers

And I'm ashamed I ever tried to be higher than the rest
But brother I am not alone
We've all tried to be on top of the world somehow
'Cause we have all been losers

I don't wanna be laid down
No I don't wanna die knowing
That I spent so much time when I was young
Just trying to be the winner

So I wanna make it clear now
I wanna make it known
That I don't care about any of that s*** no more

Don't care about being a winner
Or being smooth with women
Or going out on Fridays
Being the life of parties
No, no more, no

There will always be someone worse than you
Sister don't let it get to your head
'Cause you won't be on top of the world so long
In constant competition

This ain't about no one in particular
But I could list a few
I'm removing myself from the queue

Don't care about being a winner
Or being smooth with women
Or going out on Fridays
Being the life of parties
Don't care about being harder
Or being Daddy's favorite
Or if you think I'm a mimic
Or if I am a loser

Don't care about being a winner
Or being smooth with women
Or going out on Fridays
Being the life of parties
Don't care about being harder
Or being Daddy's favorite
Or if you think I'm a mimic
Or if I am a loser

& now off to jam to my new Indigo Girls Album, 'Beauty Queen Sister." 

Cannot wait to share my thoughts and faves of my favorite musical & lyrical artists ever created. 

XOXO, 

Kate 

got bitten

by the bitterbug. 

& I just can't get enough.  
Ill will and my own concedin,' weary of the world it seems 
I'm weary of the world, weary of the world it seems.  


Sort of always come my way
I'm just a little bit of off these days 
Like the hard knocks saw in my life 
like I'm a Bible belt wife 
Like I didn't see it com in', like i didn't walk in and leave 
-Amy Ray 

I hate to even share this post, but I am learning to be more like her
and her & realize its okay to admit our emotions. We share our good so why not show the bad too? That is the true strength of a woman.

I guess when you start losing hope&inspiration & a relationship with the real human beings around you, you rely on that from the unknown blogger.

Yup, got bitten lots this summer. Actually it all started in Spring. One bite spread to another bite and it became like an epidemic of stink bugs {ugh, I may as well add how much I hate those things}.

"Here's what I find about compromise, 
don't do it if it hurts inside 
'Cause either way you're screwed 
Eventually you'll find that you may as well feel good 
You may as well have some pride."


I don't think I would be so bitter if my kids weren't involved.
We are so protective with our children, but I never knew it this way.
Until that one bite just manifested.

You trust your gut, your heart and give that person, moment, event, struggle your all.
You lose a little of yourself in that, but here I sit with summer ending and feel as though so many relationships will never be the same. Actually, it was you, and you, you, and you who took a little of me away. 
Its unfortunate because I have always loved like 4 qualities of mine.
& you stole them from me heart. soul. & I lost; you won. 


"See I never wanna sing again, la, la, la like a butterfly 
Out my wits about me, our my heart in line 
Third time's a charm, this is mine." 


Its sad that I can let so many people in & lose so much. The funny thing is about half the people I am speaking of won't even make it this far reading.  Actually, none of them probably did. {ha}. 
Thanks to you, you and you, I will never ask for another favor, never open up the way I did. & you are slowly losing your own good traits due to your own inability to speak up and address your bitterbug. 


The irony is the people who have made it this far think this post is about them. 
{just waiting to see if I say your name, huh}?
It ain't---your just bittersweet baggage. {big difference}

"Are you my ally or my enemy? 
Do you have self-loathin' or empathy? 
Can you keep me in your prayers? 
Sister, can you keep me in there somewhere? 


And sister, if you ain't got nothin' good to say 
Don't say nothin' at all." 
-Amy Ray

bit·ter

   [bit-er]  Show IPA adjective, -er, -est, noun,verb, adverb

adjective

1.

having a harsh, disagreeably acrid taste, like that of aspirin,quinine, wormwood, or aloes.

2.

producing one of the four basic taste sensations; not sour,sweet, or salt.

3.

hard to bear; grievous; distressful: a bitter sorrow.

4.

causing pain; piercing; stinging: a bitter chill.

5.

characterized by intense antagonism or hostility: bitter hatred.

I am gunna sing again, just at a different tone. 

XOXO, 

Kate